I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is rightfully celebrated as an Hollywood heavyweight. However, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the eighties and nineties, he also starred in several critically acclaimed comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this holiday season.

The Story and That Line

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a undercover cop who masquerades as a kindergarten teacher to track down a criminal. During the film's runtime, the investigation plot acts as a loose framework for Schwarzenegger to have charming interactions with kids. Without a doubt the standout involves a child named Joseph, who out of nowhere rises and informs the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger deadpans, “Thanks for the tip.”

That iconic child was played by youth performer Miko Hughes. Beyond this role included a notable part on Full House as the bully to the famous sisters and the character of the resurrected boy in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. He also engages with fans at fan conventions. Not long ago shared his memories from the filming of the classic after all this time.

Behind the Scenes

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

Wow, I can't remember being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're brief images. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My family, especially my mother would bring me to auditions. Frequently it was a mass tryout. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all just have to wait, enter the casting office, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was extremely gentle. He was enjoyable. He was good-natured, which arguably isn't too surprising. It'd be weird if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a good work environment. He was a joy to have on set.

“It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a major movie star because my family informed me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — he was a big deal — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was just fun and I just wanted to play with him when he wasn't busy. He was occupied, of course, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd flex and we'd be holding on. He was really, really generous. He purchased for each child in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. It was the coolest device, that funky old yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It wore out in time. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being fun?

You know, it's interesting, that movie became a phenomenon. It was a major production, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, the location shoot, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was just released. That was the hot thing, and I was quite skilled. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to beat difficult stages on games because I was able to, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

That Famous Quote

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember how it happened? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it got a big laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it came about, according to family lore, was they didn't have specific roles. Some character lines were written into the script, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose someone in charge came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "I need to consider this, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. She really wrestled with it. She said she was hesitant, but she thought it will probably be one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and her instinct was correct.